JOTUNHEIM

'Sometimes we have to do things to preserve our own sanity' it wasn't really something he relished thinking. The truth was it hurt. Hurt a lot.' Ironic, he should be used to it by now, how did you ever get used to it!'

The wind whipped upon his hair sending the tails of his coat into a frenzy around his legs. Snow and ice clung in a bid to freeze his hair stiff and his skin blue. ' Ironic!' Everything around him seemed ironic. That was the bitter truth of it all.

Before him Jotunheim stretched out. Stark, bare and ruined it had been called many things when compared to Asgard. Never matching up. Never quite fitting in amongst the beauty of the other Kingdoms that surrounded it. It was just like him. like him, like the Frost Giants, it stood a relic of the past a reminder of what once was.

The ravaged land, shattering pillars of rock and ice made fragile within the torrential wind. The bleak landscape of ice and snow stretching as far as the eyes could see. Desolate. Silent except for the wind to remind him of his thoughts. He could never explain his thoughts and feelings. What he felt for this land. The sadness and destruction that lay hidden beneath the snow and within the shelter of the white capped mountain peaks.

In his mind it was bitter sweet. A fragile beauty. It was his solace. The one true place he could take off the masks he wore. The deep snow and ice hide all the hurts all the scars of the ravaged land. Here he could face the bitter cold and let his heart cry out. Face the hurts that burdened his soul and take refuge. It was him. His own special sanctuary that reflect his own mind within its landscape. It harboured his many hurts, like secrets he had wielded, each and everyone, while they hide out of sight behind his many masks until he could bring them home to Jotunheim and let the wind take them, bury them beneath the snow, where it would.

In Jotunheim, he felt at home-

Loki

The wind howled, echoing through the icy cracks of Jotunheim's once great and mighty Fortress. Like subtle snicker's it taunted Loki's thoughts, mocking his silence with its cries. Closing his eyes, his jaw clenched. The steadfast drumming of his fingers upon the cold hard rock, only a distraction. A futile bid, to block out the voices that were mocking him within his head; a moment to collect his thoughts. Was it madness...was it...WAS IT!

Jotunheim's darkness, was an old friend. Cloaking the turmoil of his thoughts, from mirroring out through his eyes.

Happiness for the most part, was no more then a mere illusion. A simple act of placing the mask to ones face. The moments where it was real, rare and far between. Moments of true exhilaration, where you stood shrouded in the glow warmth. The feeling that your heart could literally float as it silently urged your body to dance with sheer joy of the moment. Beautiful. Was there anything truly more beautiful then those very rare moments?

Bittersweet the feelings of yearning. Reaching out for something just out of your grasp. Something beautiful that will never be. Those moments were sent to tease. To make us feel the trepidation of hope, the fluttering in our chests as we sit or stand on the edge. The brink of an abyss watching what was so beautiful, that meant so much to us fade into the darkness.

Anger! It was where one was truly selfish. The feeling to lash out, inflict what hurt we could upon the feelings of others we saw as weaknesses. It was often justified as being about others. A mechanism about coming to another s defence. But to truly do that...for it to be about that, one has to be prepared to open themselves to the hurt of the other. To feel the knife that cut so deep as if it cut through their own heart. They have to face their own selfish whims for attention, acceptance, even importance. One had to open themselves, their true feelings to unlock the emotions triggered by their pride!

It was no sheer coincidence that pride was the most volatile. The hardest emotion to master! Vengeance, grudges...even ones ego. Determining that it was their given right to be accepted, adored by their peers. That their needs were of more importance then those around them. That only their opinion, was the one that truly mattered. That it was more justified!

It was true, every villain was a hero in their own mind. Every wallflower was a budding rose in fear of being overlooked or forgotten!....and all because ones pride would tell them so... Pride was the hardest emotion to face...to conquer!

He'd learned long ago, feelings were weapons. Weapons that could be used. Used to hurt, inflict and pass on the pain one might feel to others. Or to draw them close, create the false sense of security, bonds of safety.
Where many would run...hide, pretend their pride was never a factor in their feelings...He'd faced his pride. Felt the crushing weight of its burden as it ripped him apart, piece by piece. Felt the disgust and loathing at what he was...what he saw and finally accepted it as truth!

Only the most vulnerable, yet the strongest, could master pride or the many feelings one might feel each and every day. Could make sense of them and see through the many masks others might wear without giving thought to their actions each day. He'd come to understand long ago, dwelling on feelings, scared people, Midgardian's. It was like a confrontation they would rather avoid. A mirror they would never glance to long or deep into for fear of seeing the demons that would stare back at them.

The wind howled, echoing through the icy cracks of Jotunheim's once great and mighty Fortress. Like subtle snicker's it taunted Loki's thoughts, mocking his silence with its cries. Slowly, Loki opened his eyes; his brow etched into a satisfied smirk. The steadfast drumming of his fingers upon the cold hard rock, suddenly stopped and he welcomed the voices that were mocking him, within his head.
They were his vulnerability. His strength! They were his glorious burden! A burden he had long ago mastered.

Midgard, should have let him rule them... when they had the chance!........

I don't care!

RULES


" Is not this simpler? Is this not your natural state? It's the unspoken truth of humanity, that you crave subjugation. The bright lure of freedom diminishes your life's joy in a mad scramble for power, for identity.You were made to be ruled! and so here are my Rules of interaction.


1) Looking for me to save you????- I think you have the wrong Brother!- Why would I care about your mewling little life unless of course it suited my burden of glorious purpose! - and it probably wont, so quickly now- run along to Thor , if you want a hero!

2) If you possess an infinity stone, orb of power, or any weapon of great power, expect me to steal it!- I don't care who you are! - It will not stop me!

3) Ohh...but I am so very narcissistic - not sure what means?- look it up! - can't handle it?....That is exactly why you need to be Ruled!

4)If I am not here, it is because I'm away on a burden of glorious purpose! - which yes is more important to me, then waiting round hoping to hear from you!! unless of course you have an idea on how i can take over Asgard! - then you have my permission to IM me!

5) I may travel every known Realm, but make no mistake of where my home is- and the lengths i will go, to protect it!

6) Drama? Bitching?- It's not that I don't love our little talks, it's just... I don't love them. - smirks

7)Love??? tut.. tut.. Shame on you! Do not think me beguiled to fall for a pretty face or whimsical smile! - I am the God of trickery, deceit and mischief, - Do not think me as pathetic, to act like I care!

8) Is it madness? Is it? IS IT? Para multi, novella or one liner, expect back what you give!


Can you? Can you disregard my Rules? Role-Player?... Ohhh.. yes I know everything. Your Rules are dripping,it's GUSHING with demands!, and you think yours are more virtuous than my own? Do you really think what you believe will change anything? This is the basest sentimentality. This is a child at prayer... PATHETIC! Your lying to yourself! Your pretending to be separate, to have your own code, something that makes up for the horrors, of others demands. But these rules are a part of you, as well as this basic writing environment and they will never go away!

Brother

I tell myself we are not Brother's, we never were. But this is a lie!
It wouldn't hurt like it does if it was true. I hate you, like I hate myself!
Your a reminder my whole life is a lie! The image of what i grew up thinking I was, what i might someday be. You are the dream Odin laid out under my feet. The one thing that was meant to be purpose! my purpose as well as your own Brother. Your eyes reflect, what my dreams, once were. Your thoughts were once my own, your words mirrored in my thoughts as you spoke them out loud.

I hate! loath your father Odin, for I refuse to call him my father ever again. I hate him, loath him, for lying, for letting me claim you as my Brother, my best friend, myself!. I despise for you it was real! I despise that i grew up loving you more then any other! I despise that Odin's lies try to claim it from me. That you were his perfect son, I could never be.

What I have learned, is we live the lifes, we are dealt. We are the lesson's we have learned.
You, the mighty Thor, stand for the dream, given to us both as children, and I, in the eyes of others, I stand as the many lies, of deceit, that flowed upon Odin's tongue.
I will live up to that my Brother! I will live up to every lie, Odin told me! and prove that burden of his glorious purpose, behind the lies he told in effort to make you a mighty leader, was all for vain!

And as i sit upon the Throne of Asgard, I will take back all that his lies claimed from me. My life, my Birthright, but most, my right to claim, I am equally as deserving!

The weight of Us

Silence. some say its a respite, peace- They lie! its a curse, it leaves you alone, to keep yourself company, with only your thoughts! To relive over and over again your choices, your mistakes, your anger, tears. To go over again and again in your mind why! Why did they do these thing to me? what did i do wrong? and most important, why do I feel like this!

I look up, and far from the first time this day, my first thoughts are "What a dump!' That first initial reaction as i sit here looking around the frozen throne room, the grime covered black ice columns, that lay in ruin upon the floor. Again i hear the wind whistling through the rocks and cervices. Again they mock me! Taunting me to ask why!

Why was i left upon that rock? what was so wrong with me? Why!! And that's when the feelings start! they pour forth like a torrent, of love, loss, hate and despair ! Anger is the worst! it feeds my need for revenge, stops me from just walking away, turning my back for good.

My life is laid out before me, a feast of memories, serving platters laden with lies and deceit , and I hate!, but more so - I despair.
They call me the God of Mischief, lies, deceit , but i was not the first! Ohhh no! I claimed that title, learning from the best of them! The mighty Odin!

Here come the rush of hate! filling me seeking revenge! At the mere mention of his name! His eyes , even in my thoughts mock me!
"Your birthright was to die as a child! Cast out on a frozen rock! If I hadn't taken you in, you would not be here now to hate me.!"
Then I ask you Odin, WHY AM I!! WHY!!! Why not leave me there to die? At least I wouldn't of been subjected to a childhood overflowing with lies! Believing I was something i was not, Believing I belonged!
Ohhh yes Odin! you were the first, first to use someone filling them with lies of their rights to rule, of their Birth right! Not to mention a family that surrounded them daily, but was never really theirs to claim!

Was it just a whim, a passing fantasy or notion, that gave you moments of humor! A tool to make your own beloved son try harder, so hopefully one day he would surpass even your true hopes as a mighty King?
Did you honestly think, that filling the lies, with more lies would ease the burden, of the first you set upon me?
" I thought we could unite our kingdoms one day. Bring about an alliance, bring about permanent peace... through you."

"Ohh Odin you fool, you selfish old fool! You wished nothing more then to able to control the Jotunheim through me! To use me for your own purpose!! Where is the love in that? It its alongside the lie that i was YOUR SON!! Ohh you taught me well! of betrayal and deceit!

The anger overwhelms me, burdens me and I find myself rising, wishing only to destroy everything around me , flashes of blue ice shoot forth exploding the grimy columns, as I wish they were you!

That i Loki have rose, with the truth of the lies and deceit which ever drive me, in my burden for glorious purpose. My burden to prove I am just as worthy as the Brother, even Odin could not take from me, The Brother I love, and the birth right I grew up believing so strongly in.

My hand, it looks normal. Pale skin, clean nails fingers long but perfectly formed, that is until I do this. I cast my eyes down gazing upon my hand. Slowly the skin grew darker, changing like bruises forming, growing, to spread, turning my skin to blue.
I am Loki of Jotunheim, I am the God of lies deceit and Mischief. I am Asgardian